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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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I hit the streets of Perama, and it was like the city was buzzin’. You know that feeling when you step outside and the air’s thick with energy? Yeah, that. I strolled down Kifisou Street, dodging the usual chaos. Cars honking, people shoutin’, and the smell of souvlaki wafting through the air. I swear, if I could bottle that smell, I’d be a millionaire.

David Tsirekas’ signature quirky dishes return to Petersham at Perama 2.0